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How do I update beneficiaries after divorce or remarriage?

Update life insurance and account beneficiaries after divorce or remarriage: form vs will control, ERISA spouse rules, state revocation pitfalls, and a document checklist.

Reviewed September 2026.

Divorce and remarriage change who should receive life insurance and account proceeds. Updating is paperwork across every custodian, not a single will rewrite. Beneficiary forms on policies, 401(k)s, IRAs, and POD/TOD accounts usually control that asset even when a new will says otherwise. This is the life-event update guide. First-time setup across account types: How to set up account beneficiaries. Contingent role: What is a contingent beneficiary.

Why a decree or new will is not enough

DocumentWhat it usually doesWhat it often does not do
Divorce decreeMay order a former spouse removed or waive rightsAutomatically rewrite every insurer/custodian form
New willDirects probate assetsChange a valid life, IRA, or TOD/POD beneficiary form by itself
Funded trustGoverns assets retitled into that trustRewrite an unrelated policy or account beneficiary form just because the trust was updated
State “revocation on divorce” statutesMay revoke an ex as beneficiary on some non-ERISA assets (rules vary by state)Apply the same way to every ERISA plan or every policy; confirm

For many ERISA workplace plans, state “revocation on divorce” statutes do not simply rewrite the file. On a 401(k)/403(b), a new spouse often has surviving-spouse protections (subject to valid consent and any QDRO or court order). A stale ex name is still dangerous; file the plan form and confirm the portal. Workplace life beneficiary forms are separate from retirement-plan spouse rules; update both. Treat HR and the carrier portal as required steps.

Worked sketch: divorce, then remarriage

Alex divorced in 2024 with an ex named on (1) a $400,000 individual term policy, (2) a Fidelity 401(k), and (3) a Schwab TOD brokerage. Alex remarries in 2026.

AssetUpdate actionRisk if skipped
Term policyNew primary = spouse; contingent = siblingEx may remain payee if the contract and state law leave the old designation in force
401(k)Plan form + any required spousal consentOld designation, surviving-spouse defaults, or court-order conflicts can surprise heirs
Schwab TODReplace TOD names; add contingentEx may still take the brokerage if revocation-on-divorce does not apply or was not processed
Checking PODUpdate POD at the bank/CUEx, an empty form, or probate delay depending on bank defaults and state law

Workplace life needs the same pass: Supplemental life at work. Bank POD mechanics: Payable-on-death accounts.

Update checklist (divorce or remarriage)

  1. List every life policy, group life certificate, IRA, 401(k)/403(b), brokerage TOD, and bank POD.
  2. Download or screenshot the current beneficiary page before editing.
  3. File each custodian’s form; do not rely on emailing the decree alone.
  4. On remarriage, confirm spouse consent rules before naming a non-spouse primary on a workplace plan.
  5. Name a contingent beneficiary on every form.
  6. Store confirmations with the decree and estate folder; calendar a 30-day follow-up to verify the portal shows the new names.
  7. If court orders require keeping an ex on a policy (for example child support security), document that exception deliberately rather than leaving stale names by accident.

Timing tips

Update during the divorce paperwork push, then again within 30 days after remarriage or a name change. New parents adding coverage should align beneficiaries the same week the policy issues: Life insurance as a new parent.

Educational only. Not legal, tax, or estate-planning advice. ERISA, state revocation statutes, and carrier rules differ; confirm with plan administrators, insurers, and a qualified attorney.